03 Apr Put “Me Time” in Your Calendar
Its so easy to add “the important” things into our calendars; kid appointments, hair appointments, doctor’s appointments and even car maintenance appointments.
But why do we – especially mom’s – not even give it a thought to add “me time” into our calendars?
To put simply, because we don’t see “me time” as a valuable time investment.
That used to be me.
In the throws of parenting, and building my business it seemed nearly impossible to squeeze in “me time”.
That worked for years, until it didn’t.
I got to a point where I started to feel burnt out. And I was only in my early-thirties.
I was forced to look at where and who I was spending my time on, and in a nutshell it was on everybody else but myself.
I was starting to understand that “me time” wasn’t going to squeeze itself into my calendar.
I had to make “me time” an important priority.
So, I started to play around with the idea of scheduling “me time” into my calendar.
Even more than that though, I had to keep the appointment as if I had to take one of my kids to the doctor.
I surely wouldn’t think of blowing something like that off.
The more I practiced this, the more calm, cool and collected I felt.
As if my batteries just got recharged.
I found I was less reactive to the nuisances of parenting and in my business.
I was more peaceful and I began to feel whole again.
I became more loving and patient with my family and friends.
And, I felt way less resentful.
I realized that “me time” was in fact the MOST IMPORTANT THING I COULD DO FOR MYSELF AND THOSE AROUND ME.
The other evening, around 8pm, my (12 yr old) son came into my bedroom.
From 8pm – 9pm is the household quiet time. He can read, draw, stare at the walls….I don’t really care, but 9pm is when he’s expected to turn the lights out and go to sleep.
I was in the midst of my own “me time” when he made his way to me.
He came into our room, plopped himself on our bed and started chatting (which is something I actually adore).
But, I was right in the middle of writing, which was my form of “me time” in that moment.
I stopped what I was doing, gave him my undivided attention, replied and then politely said “Ok, I’m having some me time right now so can we pick this conversation up in the morning?”
And he continued talking.
“I understand, but you know how sometimes you just like to do your own thing sometimes?”
“When you do that, I don’t take it personal because I know that doesn’t take away from the love you have for me, its just that you need some time to yourself. Right?”
“Well, mom likes to do her own thing sometimes too. And that will never, ever take away from the love I have for you. Actually, it’ll only make it grow more.”
He stood up, began to exit and said “Ok. Love you.”
I didn’t feel bad about any of this either.
Kids aren’t aware that their parents need time alone.
Through their eyes, we’re there to serve them. Because well, that’s what we do best and we’ve programmed them this way.
I want my son to grow up knowing the importance of having his own me time. Whether he’s 3 years old, 12 or 90.
I don’t want him to get all caught up in the demands of life and those around him.
For me, this means I have to be willing to speak up for myself and to teach through example that “me time” is in fact an important part of a healthy life.
Actually, I take that back.
Its not important.
“Me time” does not take away from anything or anybody. It is an investment.
Take a look at your upcoming week and carve out 1-hour this week for self-care, whatever that means for you.
If one-hour seems like too much, start with just 15-minutes.
Just be sure to add something for me time.
Put it in your calendar.
Remember, this time is about YOU.
Not about the things on your to-do list. Treat this time like you would a hair appointment, or an important meeting.
You wouldn’t think of cancelling or rescheduling those so easily, right?
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