Know What You Need, Say What You Need…

13 Apr Know What You Need, Say What You Need…

If you don’t know what you need, how will you ever be able to express those needs to others?

The other day, one of our dogs had to go to the vet. The hubs was kind enough to take her. 

He came back from the vet, explained what was wrong with her (an ear infection) and told me that she needed to have medicine three times a day.

Soon after, he ever so kindly squeezes in these words “Hey, I need you to put a reminder in your calendar to put in Vegas’s medicine at 11am each day. “

At first I thought he was joking, but he wasn’t.

“Seriously?”

“Yeah, its really important that she gets it at the same time each day.”

“What’s wrong with your calendar?”

“I might forget.”

“Not if you put a reminder in your calendar you won’t. Uh, nice try. I need you to put a reminder in your calendar to put in her medicine. Please. And thanks.”

He was half smirking, so I’m sure a part of him knew I wasn’t going for that.

You see, my week was packed with tons of my own stuff already. Just like him.

My to-do list couldn’t take one more thing to be added.

I knew that.

I also knew that we’ve had this long-standing agreement…

While we both pitch in to help the other, my primary job beyond my business, are the majority of any kid appointments.

Beyond his business stuff, are any dog appointments.

When presented with the request, I had two choices:

  1. To take on the task and take the risk of being somewhat resentful about it later.
  2. To be willing to speak my needs and stand up for them.

 

Back in the day, I would have automatically opted for number one.

But I know this does not serve anybody.

Knowing, speaking and honoring your needs have to be of the up-most importance.

Sure, its not always easy to say no.

Sure, you may end up feeling like the “bad guy”.

Just remember though, that’s only in the short-term.

What’s most important in the long-term is your ability to honor your needs and speak your truth (in the most loving way possible of course).

Nobody but you knows what you need in any given moment.

 

Be willing to say no sometimes.

Be willing to be “the bad guy” every now and then.

These are not selfish acts, they’re acts of self-care.

When you take care of yourself you can better take care of others and offer more love to those around you.

🙂

~Jody 

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